Bully Stomp

I know a fine young man who has a heart of gold. He's 12 years old and in 6th grade. He is a fun-loving kid who loves sports, video games, and soccer. He is likable and very loving to his family; especially his Mom. Last year he started acting quite strangely each day before school. He would wake up frazzled to the point of spending his first hour awake on the throne. He popped Pepto for breakfast instead of his favorite chocolate donuts. He left home in tears and struggled to get through each day.

This went on for several months. Each attempt to ascertain what the problem was met with insistence from him that he didn't know. His teachers were at a loss too. No one could nail it down. Finally, a tearful breakthrough came one day as he got it off his chest and told his Mom what was bringing him down..........he was being bullied at school.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago. Again the behavior reared its ugly head. He was distant, withdrawn, and sick to his stomach. Believe it or not, when asked if his "problem" had resurfaced he adamantly denied it....at first. It didn't take as long this time to get the truth from him. The same bully was back in action.

Long story short, the problem is being dealt with but it highlights a reality that is disturbing. There is a tendency for victims to fear the perpetrator more than trust the good-guys in their life. They will let the pain of intimidation destroy them rather than tell someone who cares. What makes matters worse is when the oppressor threatens the victim with greater pain if they are inclined to rat them out. Talk about compounding the fear.

We live in a world full of bullies. They are not only in the schools, but in business, industry, and the government (ours and others). They come in all shapes and sizes and all have a similar motive. They want someone else to hurt so they feel better. The problem is they never feel better because ultimately they are miserable for one reason or another. Or, they have been victims themselves so they pass it on to others. Either way it creates a situation of pain.

What is needed is a massive Bully Stomp. If all the would-be victims in this world would rise up and kick the shit out of their respective bully, it might just send a long-needed message. Now I know the "experts" and the "pacifists" among us would argue against it. Yes, each situation is different and yes, some victims might not be as innocent as others. But, think of the power in a revolt! History has shown that a good uprising can make a difference.

The best way to disrupt the planning and execution of an adversarial plan is to do the exact opposite of what they are expecting their victim to do. Their intent is to do their deed at a time and place of their choosing. They expect success and gain strength with each subsequent action. They target the perceived weak among us so as to make their job easier. This is why it is so important to cut them off at the knees, right when they begin. Hit them hard, hit them fast, and don't stop until the threat is neutralized. In the words of one segment of the fighter pilot community; "Go ugly early!"

Teach yourself, teach your kids, teach your friends and family to commit to a life free of victimization. Make the decision now to disrupt the bullies in your life. Not every case calls for the extreme, but sending a message appropriate for the level of pain being inflicted upon you in not unreasonable. What matters most is that you do something and that they don't get to do what they had intended. Each effort toward this end will empower you to hold your head a little higher, display a little more confidence, and make you a much less attractive target.

And, if by chance you happen to be a bully........standby!